to dear Dee Why

Recommended Soundtrack: "Are You With Me Now?" by Cate Le Bon

Dee Why (DY). A place that is difficult to read and that I am happy and sad to leave. So many milestones, so much re-signifying my own life and some few down lows that allowed me to put myself back up – and endless dumps as I learned how to surf, but also in this element, overcoming and becoming, it is after all just about holding your breath and finding your way up.

The surf break at the beach and the point at Dee Why have its challenges and are difficult to read. Although I took on surfing, I’m certainly not a pro, but according to skilled and local surfers, it really is an unpredictable surf. Both of which by the way, against all odds, accepted me and welcomed me to their community. From circa the 1970s until I dare say not so long ago, the Dee Why point surf boys had a bad reputation in terms of localism – and potentially prejudice as I’ve heard a story once that they stabbed a girl who tried to surf the point in the 1980s. But that could have easily been a lie or a distorted story (still, even if fictional, apparently the girl would have survived). And I wouldn’t be too bold in saying there was prejudice against migrants as well. Admittedly, Brazilians (who took over DY and have nicknamed it Dee Why de Janeiro) suck in respecting the surf conduct and line up etiquette – it pains me because I obviously love my people and the surf culture is just as significant as the technical practice (Surfing as intangible cultural heritage). I actually never made any Brazilian friends in the old hood. Or many friends for that matter. But I convinced my best friend to move to Dee Why and as we discussed a few times, in high-altitude states of mind, we don’t need many friends, we just need deep rooted friendship who we can talk about things that are good and bad and have a laugh, friends who you can do activities that you like and dislike together because the company makes it better. However, it is also important to have a sense of community. And Dee Why brought me that and more. I made some surf buddies, even with locals and skilled surfers who went above and beyond, provided me with helpful tips for developing my surfing and were happy to see my improvement. I met lots of people who you recognise and greet on the street, at the French café or Bambolini, or up the fancier shops. I drank many beers with the old school gang from Dee Why at the Deck and partied at a memorial beach service (followed by more beers at the Deck) for two community members. And I watched the sunrise many times, alone, but with my community surrounding me. Those pivotal moments were photographed by yet another local legend who always had his sunrise walk and cherished us all with smiles and giggles as he stopped for a shot of ‘what made Dee Why beautiful’.

Now this community is just as hard to read as the surf. It is one Northern Beaches community, surf vibe, laid back, mostly trades work, filled with cool warehouses and surfboard factories, and now all the breweries. A surf lifestyle that is found in families, young people, and retired people alike. But Dee is somewhat different from Freshie, Curly, and the upper ones Narrabeen, Mona, Avalon etc. It finds itself in a multicultural concave of people who live in mostly undeveloped buildings and houses. There are still some houses, which are mostly community houses for those who need support; and in contrast, up in the only ‘done up’ part of the hood, you can still find an old mall where you can buy any-thing, including from interesting looking elderly people who smoke indoors. It all happens in front of a science church thing and DY has in fact various churches. You can also do all sorts of classes and activities in Dee Why, the more you search for it, the more you find, and it becomes almost unsurprising that I have done ballet, jazz, piano lessons, kung fu, karate, yoga and played team sports in one year. I tried the infra-red sauna, but I refused to do the group ice baths. But then again, although it seemed annoying to me, I respect and admire in awe that this community is also a chore element of DY. According to Marina, all the cacao ceremony, full moon ceremony, drum therapy manifestation kind of people were to be found in DY.

There’s no real definition for the DY community, I guess it is all. It’s all I needed anyway.

As I leave, not sure if I’ll ever go back to it, or to Australia for that matter, I realise that my Dee life was the closer to the Australian dream that I have always wanted. I faced a big stumble at the start, which turned out to be fundamental to finding my own near perfect life. With salt water from the ocean and tears that came from sad and happy moments alike, I found my path to evolution and becoming mother-tucking invincible.

But it certainly helped that I had visits from the people I love the most in DY. People who live in Sydney (south of the bridge) and complain it is too far; people who live in Melbourne and are absolutely amazed by how you can get to live in such a paradise close to the city; and some members of my dear family, who flew all the way across the world to share some unforgettable moments in my beautiful home where you could just about see the ocean with a neck stretch.

I shared the apartment with seven (7!) flatmates in total. Although all for a couple or a few months max, every single one of them (after putting on the scales) were worth sharing my life with. Everyone was in great spirits, brought good vibes, and so many laughs – that includes you Eth, as I know you’re reading this now. Just kidding, you are still, one of my favourite people.

I’ll miss the food options too, from Brazilian to Nepalese and all the food markets, where according to Max, was a gangster’s paradise not too long ago. Cycling all the way to Narrabeen lagoon and around it, where all the men in their middle life crisis are doing the same wearing their cyclist costumes. My spot there, and my spot at Dee Why lagoon, where it was warm even on windy and colder days – also where I ventured (and succeeded, against all odds) on skating. The walk to Long Reef and Collaroy, which has weirdly become the place of goodbyes. The little ‘hike’ according to Georgia to Curly, where I have all my hidden treasure spots to sit down and read. And last but definitely not least, my obsession with bench plaque memorials. Dee Why had some of the most creative and deep-seated (apologies for the punch) touching messages. My favourite was at the rock pool hill where I liked to sit down when I was pretending to work and was often greeted by the man with a pet snake. I’ll miss it all very much.

I suppose I still don’t know entirely what has prompted me to leave. ‘It can’t get much better than this’, Dan used to say. But as my mother alluded to, anytime something seems too good in my life, it seems like somehow, I need a change. In this case, I’m focusing that my change, learning how to sail as I venture across the Pacific islands, and potentially crossing an ocean, will allow me to return to my writing, put a novel together and improve this painful blogging attempt to you my few dear readers… and with it, find a way to a full perfect life. One that because of my time in Dee Why, I can finally taste how it will be like.